Having one partner for life is just unrealistic

I love discovering that I’m ahead of the curve. It last happened in 2001 when I mistook a nightie for a dress, and spearheaded the nineties revival a decade too early. And according to a new survey, my cavalier attitude to relationships will be all the rage soon. As terrifying as this sounds, I’m really not joking. Dating website Elite Single has conducted a survey of 445 of its members in an attempt to predict the key trends for future relationships in the 21st Century. The upshot? Till death do us part, 2.5 children and a golden wedding anniversary, is so last decade. Instead the emphasis will shift to serial monogamy, as we move from partner to partner throughout different stages of our lives. The survey also suggested that we are on track to become far more individualistic, looking for ‘experience’ marriages rather than staying in a couple for survival. Essentially, as it becomes less imperative to remain in a couple for material security, we’ll start to balance the need for stability with the realisation of our personal goals, in an effort to maintain our sense of self. Equally, single-dom will no longer be the preserve of 20 and 30-somethings as people of all ages will find themselves sans partner, and the quality of a relationship will start to have much more bearing than the length of time it lasts for. This resonates with me hugely, because I haven’t ever ‘needed’ a partner for financial or even emotional stability. I own my own place, I can easily support myself and I have fantastic friends. Equally, I’ve never managed to relate the loss of self you get with a relationship with the fulfillment so many of my friends seem to get from theirs. To be frank, the compromises you have to make, and the bits of yourself you have to chip away to make a relationship work for 10, 20 or 30 years have never seemed worth it.